So we have uncovered some different places to have sex, and now it’s time to reveal where not to have sex, so you don’t have to find out hard way!

You may be thinking that sex is surely enjoyable anywhere, however that doesn’t mean that there aren’t some places to have sex that are preferable to others.

The thrill of getting intimate in a different, adventurous place heightens the experience and makes the mood hotter, sure. Yet, here are six locales that might actually dampen your mood, and are likely to turn disastrous as you try to get down to it.

Aeroplane

We’ve all heard of the mile high club, and if you haven’t, where have you been hiding? Having sex in an aeroplane toilet is on many people’s sexual to do list, yet many people claim the hype is not all it is cracked up to be. The largest restroom you will encounter at 30,000 feet is going to be no more than 3ft by 5ft, which is only a bit wider than a refrigerator, and certainly not designed for two. This means the lovemaking is likely to be awkward and squashed, if you actually make it that far without a flight attendant sussing you out. If they catch you mid sex, you could even potentially be in some trouble, and we’re not sure if a cramped quickie where other people relieve themselves is actually worth the hassle.

Portaloo

Let’s face it, they are likely even more unsanitary than an aeroplane toilet, yet the amount of people who attempt to have sex in a cramped, smelly portaloo is admirable. We know it might seem a turn off now but in the moment, who knows what will happen. It can often be a spur of the moment decision, so be sure to pack some condoms as well as your wellies.

Your parents’ bed

It doesn’t need much explanation, it’s your parents’ bed – they have done the things you are contemplating doing in that bed, and they are your parents.

A water bed

Sex on a waterbed is certainly a workout, and you will truly test your core strength as you both try to stay upright. If you fancy a challenge/laugh or have no other options, water bed sex could be all right if you are OK with sticking to one winning position and not putting much effort into pleasing your partner.

Top bunk

If you are visiting your parents’ house for the weekend and your beloved bunk beds are still a prize feature in your childhood bedroom, it may be tempting to make love when you get a moment of privacy, yet there are certain setbacks to this plan! For a start, you probably weighed a little bit less the last time you stayed up there, and probably weren’t moving the bed as dramatically – are you sure this wooden frame can handle your two moving bodies? And secondly, you will be cramped, and your faces will be inches away from the ceiling – claustrophobic much?

Down an alleyway

If you fancy getting dirty (literally) in public, an alleyway could be your best bet. However, if you don’t take the right precautions, they could be bad for your health as there are germs galore. Don’t have sex lying down or sitting, hide behind some bins or other large object, and keep your ears alert for passing strangers.